#he's a huge dick

[ghost-in-the-corner]

I'm currently catching up on Puppet History, and about halfway through the most recent episode (Pope's Nepobaby) and when the Professor read the quote about the dude getting ripped in half, I snorted.

When he got to the question, I didn't even wait a beat. "Chapter 8 of Machiavelli's Prince, thank you and good night."

Didn't even realize I said it until the Zach bought a letter. Then I just started laughing.

Do I win Puppet History? Am I a History Wizard??? 👀

[trashmakerarticle]

Everyone thinks that dick was the golden child when in reality it was Jason.

Clark: Bruce who was your favourite robin?

Dick: obviously it’s me?

Tim: it’s dick

Damian: I am superior robin, it will be me.

Bruce: it’s Jason

Everyone: WHAT?!?!???

Bruce: why are you so surprised? He didn’t jump on too my chandeliers which I had to replace each week

*everyone looks at dick*

Bruce: he didn’t drop out of school

*everyone looks at tim*

Bruce: I didn’t have to stop him from killing everyone who annoyed him

*everyone looks at Damian*

Bruce: in fact, he enjoyed school and handed all his homework in on time, we would spend hours in the library reading his favourite classics. He even helped Alfred with most of the cooking, He was my little boy

Jason: stop spreading lies, I hate you go away

Bruce: my precious little boy

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

After some very eventful weeks of Jason’s debut as the Red Hood he takes a well deserved night off and decides to crash in one of his safe houses.

He did not count on one of the Bats finding him there.

So to keep his plans from being torpedoed entirely Jason goes with the split second decision of pretending he was held captive by the Red Hood.

[astorianyxkings]

There's always people theorizing how the Batfamily hides Jason disappearance and reappearance, but I literally haven't seen anyone use the best explanation: Witness Protection.

Like this literally answers every question. The Death Certificate? They had to fake his death. The empty grave? Obviously it had to be believable. The time when Wayne Heir "Richie Wayne" refused to step foot in Gotham and talk to his father? He was pissed about Jason's (non) death. Brucie Wayne's very real depression after his death? Well he lost contact with his son and he was under immense stress from the government.

Like this literally answers every question I can come up with. Why has no one said he was in witness protection? And if people have done it, send me fics and prompts because I'm obsessed.

And the best part is, the Waynes are so stupidly rich that they could pull it off. Lex Luther could try and conduct his own investigation but somehow he can never find anything concrete. And if he gets too close either Babs hacks them or Tim just calls up Conner for a distraction.

One time Jason gets cornered and asked how he felt about returning to his life after being in Witness Protection. Unfortunately, him and Bruce weren't on the best terms to explain the whole story but he comes in clutch. He spins the tale about how heartbroken he was to see his brother, father and grandfather grieving and how honored he was when he learnt his new little brother idolized him. Tim got ahold of a copy of the interview and will never let Jason live it down.

The media doesn't ask Bruce questions about Jason's death because last time they did he broke down and a suddenly furious reporter chastised them and reminded them that while Jason may be alive Bruce still mourned his death. The picture of Bruce in tears at the interview is currently one of Jason's favourite lockscreens.

Same goes for Dick. Any questions of his brother's death results in (1) Richie Wayne ready to throw hands at any and everybody, (2) his wife (well one of them) Barbara Gordon threatening the reporters or (3) That same Metropolis reporter chastising the whole community again.

[infinityinakiss]

why the FUCK did no one tell me that elementary is one of the best adaptations of sherlock?

[latimeria-fell-from-heaven]

there's just something about this sopping soggy specimen of an alien that makes me want to suck his dick-

[radarchives]

i was sent to anime hell and all i got were these 7 stupid pacts

[cologona]

It’s important to me that Jason look just like Dick, but only as a kid.

Once Jason gets older his features mature into something totally different and it’s obvious they have different body types.

Like Bruce took home a ‘teacup pig’ one day thinking it was so cute and small, not knowing what he was getting himself into. Now ten years later, he has a several-hundred-pound animal who’s huge and hairy and way smarter than he ever expected or wanted it to be, hanging out in his house causing problems and he doesn’t like it so much anymore.

[qiu-yan]

MDZS and asshole victims: thoughts on the second siege of the burial mounds scene

this post is not about morality judgments. this post is about reader sympathies only.

one rather clever rhetorical trick MDZS employs is putting all the more background "surviving victims of wei wuxian's actions" into one big angry mob at the second siege of the burial mounds, instead of letting them crop up anywhere else in the story. it's easy for a first-time reader to write off the guy who lost a leg at nightless city, or the guy whose parents died at nightless city, because both of those guys are being dicks. they're part of an angry mob baying for wei wuxian's blood--unfairly baying for wei wuxian's blood, because this time he didn't even do the thing they're saying he did. by putting these two victims into a mob of not just fellow victims but also unaffected individuals (ie. sect leader yao, who just showed up for kicks), the story can effectively equate these victims' grievances (ie. "you killed my parents") with unreasonable mob rule--even if these two things might not actually be equivalent.

the effect of this rhetorical trick, then, is that the reader can at once perceive the themes about mob mentality MXTX wishes to convey, and also effectively write off the victims' complaints. "yes, i did that to you, but i literally died already, what more do you want me to do? shall i walk on my knees repenting?" becomes easier for the reader to accept. and more importantly--wei wuxian's likability as a moral and just protagonist is not impacted.

ngl tho. it would be a bit more difficult for the reader to write off these victims' complaints if, instead of meeting said victims in an angry mob, the reader instead met these victims almost anywhere else. imagine if, instead of meeting mr. "you killed my parents" at the second siege of the burial mounds, we instead met him getting smashed at the local bar and crying about how his parents are dead. imagine if, instead of meeting mr. "you chopped off my leg" as a member of an angry mob, we instead met him begging for alms on the side of the road because his disability rendered him unable to work in a wuxia-esque setting. or imagine--if either of these background characters, overcome with survivor's guilt and trauma from nightless city, hung himself in his bedroom, and the next day his body was discovered by his 15-year-old daughter.

all of these scenarios are entirely plausible. you could easily include any of them into the story without changing the main plot at all. but suddenly shit just got a lot more depressing.

however, no such scene would ever be included in MDZS. the reason is that, as a work of fiction, MDZS's single most ardent goal is for us the readers to conclude not just that "we like wei wuxian as a character," but also that "wei wuxian is ultimately a morally righteous person." when the narrative focus shifts onto the people who were actually helped by wei wuxian's actions (mianmian and her family, lan sizhui, the few months of dignity the wen remnants were afforded) this becomes much easier for us to conclude; wei wuxian does indeed look like a hero. but the more narrative focus is given to the negative impacts of wei wuxian's actions--the more the "victims of wei wuxian" (whether actual victims or not) are given a face, instead of abstracted away by broad summaries--the more the reader might side-eye wei wuxian instead. every new victim given a name, given narrative attention that isn't just focused on making them look like an asshole, arouses the reader's sympathies in the opposite direction--and thus increases the risk that the reader might ultimately disagree with the novel's conclusion of "wei wuxian is a righteous person."

tbh, this does not seem like a risk MXTX particularly wants to take. instead, she's mastered the art of writing Asshole Victims.

which is an entirely valid writing decision, because imo basically every work of genre fiction out there does this to some extent.

[katabay]

so. around the start of august, I decided to make a story to work on when I wanted to just kind of turn my brain off for a minute. you know, everything is so much all the time, let's lower the stakes and draw some ancient greeks wrestling.

unfortunately for ME, I thought: well what if we explored the peloponnesian war through the sword and sandals genre and throw in a splash of horror for seasoning! then I thought: well it wouldn't be fun for me if I didn't do some reading on the history of it all. what I do I know about ancient greece. I have a fistful of pocket lint and loose change in that department.

folks. there is so much reading. my reading list is only a handful of books, but each of those books is a fucking brick.

anyway, it's still primarily a For Fun story I do in my spare time, so some wrestling sketches, and some other kind of scene :)

⭐the one with the beard is klaudios, the one with the longer hair is damonikos!

[onerudegentleman]

when I’m in a who’s the biggest loser competition and my opponents are these guys

[rms-mathematic]

My list of alternate reasons Alastor may have chosen not to join the Vees:

He's flat broke but doesn't want to admit it. They would have had to combine their finances and his secret would have been revealed to the world.

He didn't want to give Nifty any more ammunition for the creepy RPF she writes (and forces him to beta read) about him and Vox.

He'd have to change his name to Valastor and that's stupid.

Rosie and Valentino actually have long-standing personal beef. Not over anything important, mind you, Val just owes her fifty bucks and refuses to pay her back, but it's been going on for decades and puts every other overlord rivalry in the history of Hell to shame.

Velvette once told him something was "on fleek" and he realized there was no way he was going to survive living with her full-time.

Vox wanted them to all get matching tattoos.

He was secretly very disappointed to find out they weren't a polycule because he thought that was kind of cool.

There was this one super embarrassing incident back in the 80s where he got way too drunk and threw up all over Valentino. They haven't been able to look each other in the eye since.

He's emotionally attached to each and every tear in his coat and is afraid Velvette will patch it up when he's not looking.

All three of them are actually very outspoken vegans, and as an obligate carnivore, that was obviously not going to work out.

[coffeeworldsasaki]

Gotta say people that throw a fit every time someone mentions the possibility of seeing some solavellan in datv are quickly becoming my least favorite people in a fandom filled with unpleasant people. Yes Solas is one of the main characters in datv, there should be more mentions of the romance thanks to that, maybe a 20 minutes romance will become a 25 minutes one should we call the police or can you shut the fuck up

[deepfriedseagullfeet]

also this may be a basic thing to say but wilford warfstache is sooo well written. like hes so fleshed out. he has such a specific personality and aesthetic and his backstory is well done and makes sense and it all ties together with who he is now. hes so iconic and yeah hes one of mark's most popular characters but i think its for a reason. hes so silly goofy

[goatsghost]

an update on how i draw the wayne kids + some headcanons <3

[littlefankingdom]

Dick: The Titans don't want me to be their leader. :(

Bruce *who already has put in the Justice League plans and systems that if anything happens to him, Dick becomes the leader, even tho Batman isn't the unique leader of the JL*: Making mistakes is an important part of growing up.